\u201cIt\u2019s not fair!\u201d This is our instinctive complaint when we do not get what we want. Most adults have learned to hide this feeling, so we notice it most in children. They are quick to lament the injustice of a moment and vocally declare their parents unfair. Children need no course in identifying fairness; it is as though it is innately wired within them. Consider these statements:<\/p>\n<\/p>\n
\u201cThat\u2019s not fair. My brother got a phone when he was 13; why can\u2019t I have one?”
\u201cWhy does he get to stay up late and I can\u2019t?\u201d
\u201cIt\u2019s not fair! I\u2019m the only one with a curfew.\u201d<\/p>\n
The underlying belief is that what happens for one person must happen for the next person, too, or to be more accurate, \u201cI must have the same as whoever has the most and the best.\u201d Voil\u00e0! Fairness!<\/p>\n
When your child is denied what they believe they deserve, they turn to you and question\u2014even challenge\u2014your goodness. \u201cIt\u2019s not fair\u201d often morphs into \u201cYou<\/em> are not fair\u201d or \u201cYou<\/em> are not good.\u201d A young person\u2019s heart is always at work when they complain about fairness, so in our home, we keep it simple. We reply with something like<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" \u201cIt\u2019s not fair!\u201d This is our instinctive complaint when we do not get what we want. Most adults have learned [\u2026]
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