We know we need friends, and God even ordained friendship as part of His good gifts to creation. But developing friendships is difficult. Men, in particular, have great difficulty developing friendships, but that is what they most desperately need when facing trials in life. As we seek to counsel men, we need to connect them with social support. Continue Reading →
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Sexual intimacy is not a solution to all marital tension. There may be an occasion or two where the act of sex between a husband and wife has a reorienting effect and helps to renew connection and love for one another after conflict. In general, however, sexual intimacy develops out of relational intimacy and should not, therefore, be used as a fix-all for marital conflict. Biblical counselors, then, should not recommend sexual intimacy as the cure for relational conflict. Continue Reading →
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Shame might be one of the most common human experiences. We feel shame for all sorts of reasons, but ultimately, it points to an internal belief that we are somehow and in some significant way not enough. We are different, unlike others, inadequate, and insufficient in comparison to them. The Bible uses a number of metaphors to capture the concept and experience of shame. By exploring shame through these metaphors, we can see how fully Christ deals with our shame. Continue Reading →
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Hoarding has become a major issue in American culture. We know this not simply from the number of reality shows that highlight the issue, but also from the governmental task forces set up to deal with the problems that arise from hoarding. Statistics vary, but some data suggests that 1 in every 20 people struggles with hoarding; upwards of 15 million people in the U.S. could be considered to have a hoarding problem. But what causes hoarding, and can biblical counseling help? While the Scriptures do not speak specifically to hoarding disorder, they do speak to fear-based consumption, and that provides us a great deal of help in treating hoarding. Continue Reading →
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The band Relient K wrote a song years ago about hating consequences and trying to avoid them. I can resonate with that song. Nobody likes consequences, and yet God has designed them to be a means of helping us repent, grow, and change. Facing our consequences is still hard, but there is hope. God’s continued care in our consequences makes it possible to have hope as we face them. Continue Reading →
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