Life is like a basement. It’s like a basement in that, despite our best efforts, we just can’t keep it from getting cluttered. Every few months, Aileen and I have to go downstairs and clear out our back room—that room where empty boxes accumulate as we decide if we will keep or ship back the products we’ve ordered, where broken stuff waits until the next bulk garbage day, where unwanted or unused things sit until they are given away or repurposed. We always intend to keep the basement clean and clear, but it somehow keeps getting full and disorganized. Despite our best efforts, it seems to attract clutter. Our lives can be like this, and so too our families.

On a personal level, we intend to live purposeful lives where every activity has a clear purpose and every commitment serves a defined goal. We have done our best to say the quick no and slow yes and in that way to make thoughtful decisions about where we focus our time, energy, and attention. But in moments of clarity we realize that our lives have still become surprisingly full—cluttered, even. We realize we are attending meetings, or taking lessons,


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