It is hard to believe it has been 10 weeks since Nick went to heaven—10 weeks since I last FaceTimed him, since I last texted him, since I last shared a belly laugh with him. He is still the first thing I think about when I wake up in the morning and he’s still on my mind as I fall asleep at night. The pain is different now than it was in the first few weeks, but while it may be less sharp, it’s no less present. I miss him dreadfully. I miss our friendship, I miss our conversation, I miss him teaching me what he was learning at seminary. I miss him personally, but then I also miss the very fact of having a son. Being a father to a son was one the great joys of my life, but a joy that has now been interrupted. I hardly know who I am without a son following eagerly in my footsteps.
As time passes, we are slowly working our way back into normal life, though normal life is still plenty abnormal by any objective standard. A couple of weeks ago our province was put into a
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