The person you are going to meet with may be older than you. Or younger than you. Perhaps they are from a different part of the country—or from another country. It may be a spouse in distress or a person who is contemplating a major life decision. Given the vast differences in people and situations, no single approach always applies the first time you sit down with someone to offer help. Even so, there are ways you can be ready to conduct a first session so that it proves to be a productive time. What are those ways? How can you best ensure that a person leaving that first meeting with you feels hopeful about the help that can come from a fruitful counseling relationship?
In my experience, the best way to make a meaningful connection with someone in a first session is to keep the following in mind:
Something hurts. People don’t come to counseling to talk about things that are going well. Something isn’t working. Something is hard. If I hold in mind that something hurts, then my fundamental posture toward this person will be one of compassion (Col 3:12).
Pursuing counseling is not fun or easy.
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