I was a murderer.
When I was twenty-five I became pregnant. Unsaved, unmarried, and raised in a church that taught that babies weren’t human until they were born, the solution to my “problem” was nauseatingly simple. So, I made an appointment, had the procedure, took a few days off from work, and went back to life as usual.
It was only after the Lord saved me that I realized the weight of what I’d done. The sin was so heinous and irreparable, and the guilt and shame were so overwhelming, that it was nearly ten years before I told anyone other than my husband what I had done. I believed that God had forgiven me of my sin of abortion, and yet my guilt and shame lingered.
What I lacked was an understanding and application of the substitutionary atonement of Christ. My lingering guilt and shame were a result of not really understanding that, in addition to forgiveness, my salvation also brought me justification and a right standing with God. The wrath of God that I justly deserved has been completely satisfied by Christ; therefore, God removed the guilt of my sin and granted to me the righteousness of Christ
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