by Anna Mondal
You sit, sick with sorrow, as your counselee discloses stories of incest, a forced abortion, or cruel childhood neglect. And these things you shudder to think of, had to be endured.[1] What do you say in response to the unsayable?
God provides (and Christ models) an authentic, whole-person, trauma-aware option for responding to horrors: the language of lament.
What is lament?
Lament is expressing pain God-ward as an act of faith. It vocalizes our deepest shame and sorrow to God, pleading for His intervention. Lament says, “God, this hurts! Help!” Mark Vroegop, author of Dark Clouds, Deep Mercy, says “lament is the language for the in-between world,” bridging life’s trauma and trust in God.[2] “To cry is human, to lament is Christian.”[3]
Still, many Christians struggle to believe it’s okay to lament. We think “good Christians” don’t cry or complain.[4] We may avoid expressing sadness, believing we should “exhibit to God an unflinching, joyful acceptance of His will.”[5] Tim Keller points out that this posture can be “a subtle legalism, a way of securing God’s favor by being good and not complaining.”[6]
Lament is for the shattered ones. The people who are too broken to perform for
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