A wise friend once told me, “No one should write a book about marriage until they’ve been married for twenty years.” Then he reached his twentieth anniversary and amended his rule: “No one should write a book about marriage until they’ve been married for thirty years.” The point is, none of us ever master marriage, because marriage, like the people involved in it, is constantly changing. Yet even though we never master it, there is much we can learn from those who have the wisdom and experience we lack. Dave Harvey’s I Still Do, a follow-up to his popular When Sinners Say “I Do,” is a kind of guide to the second half of marriage, to the years that come long after the initial exchange of vows, the honeymoon, and the baby years. Harvey says to “consider this a ten-year checkup.”
His book is framed around a number of life-defining moments that come a few years or a few decades into marriage. These are “experiences, events, and decisions that determine (and sometimes alter) your whole direction.” It’s not just that marriage as an institution is ordained by God, or even that each individual marriage has been ordained by
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