It’s striking that the church in Corinth could muster the courage to ask Paul about sex—something so personal and delicate. It’s something that’s universally difficult to talk about, let alone address in a letter to an apostle. It is even more surprising that they ask about sexless marriages, to which Paul responds, “Do not deprive each other except perhaps by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer” (1 Cor 7:5).
Our modern minds might react in any one of three ways to this statement.
“Don’t most people know that sexual intimacy is good within the context of a loving marriage? Does Paul really need to remind couples to prioritize it?” “Oh great. Now I feel like I’m a disappointment to my spouse and to God.” “How many times has this verse been misused to condemn and coerce a reluctant spouse into having sex more often?”
Paul, too, would be dismayed to know how some have wielded this verse in selfish ways.
But Paul’s actual words and tone are surprisingly beautiful. Four times in these brief verses (1 Cor 7:1–7), Paul presents a vision of radical mutuality and sexual equality in
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