People in the church often say foolish and hurtful words to those who are grieving.
“If I were you…”“At least you still have…”
“Just [pray, read your Bible, keep praising the Lord, etc….]”
“What is God trying to teach you?”
Those last two don’t seem too bad. Prayer is good. It is the “just” that makes it difficult. Anytime we say “just,” we are consultants who give simplistic advice. In this case, we also assume that the grieving person doesn’t pray.
“What is God trying to teach you?” God is, indeed, doing something in us through our suffering, but this question suggests that we must figure out the mysterious and specific purposes of God, as though God is posing a riddle. Or it follows the lead of Job’s comforters and suggests that we must find that particular sin that is causing the entire mess.
Those who hear these words might overlook the offense yet resolve to never again share their hearts with the perpetrators. Others assume that the comments are representative of the culture of God’s people, in which Christians should always be thankful and never complain. Either way, we isolate those who already feel alone, and we misrepresent the kingdom of
To continue...read the full-length post originally published on this site.
